The Dark Side of Valentine’s
There is a dark side to Valentine’s Day that usually takes place the day of or the night before that special day. It’s the time most cheaters choose to spend with their mistresses. The reason for this is simple. Waiting until the day after V-Day is too obvious and the last thing they want her to think is that she a further after thought. Odds are she already knows she’s the other woman. She gets wined and dined first not because she is valued more, but because cheaters know just how special Valentine’s day is for all women; especially girlfriends and wives. Even if one or both women genuinely feel that Valentine’s Day is nothing more than a commercial success, and it is, they still want to be acknowledged. They want to feel special, and only one of them is going to be okay with settling for less than, i.e., the day before or after V-Day. The cheater decides which one will put up less of a fight to determine who gets what day. It’s tough for women to listen to their girl friends go on and on about how they were romanced and swept off their feet when all they did was sit at home watching Law & Order reruns. Although a cheater could spend Valentine’s Day with both women, they realize that they can only spend the night with one.
Some cheaters are bold enough to see both women on Valentine’s Day. Imagine this. Your significant other is missing for a few hours that day. The reason she gives is believable so you think nothing of it. Especially since it’s family related. Besides, there are a thousand thoughts running through your mind about what’s in store for the day and later that night, and another woman isn’t one of them. I will tell you this; Valentine’s Day is a stressful time of year for cheaters. The best are able to play it off so well you would never know their anxiety level is high. Others are short-tempered leading up to the day because they are calculating and planning up to the hour. Any mistakes could be costly. But now is not the time to be concerned with anything. The excuse worked so it’s time to play.
One of the biggest ways of getting caught on or around Valentine’s Day is by having text messages, phone calls, and e-mails read or intercepted by a suspecting girlfriend. When a woman reaches her wits end she will sometimes do things she’d normally never do. Like invade your privacy. Others are willing to dismiss their roused suspicion for the sake of spending quality time with their cheater. Paying for gifts with credit or debit cards especially if they share a checking account with their significant other can get a cheater caught. I recall buying flowers for my girlfriend and my lover, paying with my debit card and praying I didn’t get caught when the statement arrived. I triple checked names and delivery addresses before submitting the order. Would the florist mix up the order, or worse, the messages? Most cheaters use a pet name when sending flowers to further avoid confusion in case of a mix-up. The anxiety that follows is consuming until everything is received exactly as ordered. Cheaters pull out all the stops on Valentines Day despite the fact that they’ve obviously been cheating before then.
There was one year in particular that I spent Valentine’s Eve with my other woman. I spent the night at her place even though she had to work half a day the next morning. We spent the entire day together since I wouldn’t be with her on V-Day. I gave a lame excuse but deep down I knew she knew whom I was really going to be with. I stayed in bed until the sound of the doorbell brought me out of a late morning slumber. I went to answer the door and was met by a delivery guy holding a huge bouquet of flowers. That was interesting because the flowers I sent were scheduled to arrive on Valentine’s Day, in my absence. I accepted the delivery and sat them on the coffee table. She came home later that afternoon and upon seeing the flowers looked surprised. I told her they weren’t from me so she opened the card that was attached. Not only was it signed by her ex-girlfriend, but she had given my mistress her last name so it would appear that they were married. It was clever indeed, but I wasn’t sure what her ex was thinking, or whether it was really her ex that sent the flowers. I didn’t react that day, but I did take the card and receipt when I left that night. I must have dropped it in my car at some point because the next time I saw them they were in the hands of my girlfriend. And she wanted answers. I denied sending the flowers, but to explain the presence of these items would prove fruitless and did not matter anyway so I said nothing instead. I took the mental beat down that accompanied my silence. This was one instance where truth in the midst of lies is not really truth at all.
The point of all of this is to say that Valentine’s Eve or “Mistress Day” is just as commercially successful as Valentine’s Day. Don’t discount it. This certainly doesn’t apply to all relationships, just my personal experiences, and lots of others I’m aware of. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. There is no justifying cheating no matter what, it’s wrong. You have two options; the hard one provides immediate relief and looming consequences and the harder one doesn’t provide any immediate relief but will bring a sense of piece of mind and looming permanent relief that is good, real and not a facade. The hard road consists of working on yourself and your relationship from the inside out. A girlfriend or wife’s suspicions will eventually add up. My advice is to do whatever you can to keep the relationship healthy or get out of it entirely. Anything to prevent cheating is worth trying.