Honoring My Woman
It’s not always easy to be the person I want to be. And sometimes it’s hard for you to understand what I’m feeling. At times, I can be the most charming, loving person to be around, but there are times when I’m distant, content with the isolation that surrounds. And it makes you reserved and sad. But there’s no reason for that, I just need to be alone with myself. In fact, I don’t need to know all of your secrets either, I just need to know your heart is receiving what I give her. There is so much I want to share with you, but most of it depends on what my heart’s feeling too.
When I’m quiet it means I’m lost in thought. Not that I’m ignoring you, baby-girl, not at all. It seems like the more we love, the more sensitive you become. The more we make love, the more drawn to me you are. I find that at times you feel hurt by me, too easily, but our passionate emotions have never come completely between us. And when you put two and two together, we feel loves emotions, as one.
Just know that my heart is so open to you it feels vulnerable. I fully understand that I am driven by passion, while loves fire remains your fuel, that’s why the sex is outstanding. As we already know I don’t always use reason when it comes to women. But I blame myself for their submission, ’cause when I was too busy indulging in it to concern myself with why passion had to be my center, I got no results, yet I continued. Every relationship, passionate, and still, some broken-hearts need patching. But for now I just need to chill and relax and think less about all of my misgivings.
At times I need to be alone, to recharge my batteries. To believe in myself enough to become a better me.
And so I thank you for being the woman you are, Kelly. The deep, understanding, going over, above, and beyond for me. When it comes to my woman-handling, you are braver than anyone I’ve ever seen. More than anyone whose ever loved me. With that said, I’ve asked a million times why does she… why does her devotion to me come just as easy as her loving? Why does my charm get mistaken, I mean why do I allow it to get the best of me. Yet as easy as it comes I can give it away just as freely. But it’s not free, and if my history bears repeating. You know what I was addicted to was the giving and receiving.
You see, lust is one thing, but when you open yourself up emotionally. It’ll fuck up your whole belief system, have you believing you can do anything. I’ve been conflicted time and again and run the gamut of multiple relationships, but here I am and here we are. Full circle and we’re sailing. Our ships drifting off to sea, but we’re together in this sailboat, and I learned to sail at summer camp so it’s more than just hope afloat. I just want you to know I love you. It bears repeating. To love someone is to be able to see not only with your eyes, but with everything. To love is to make sacrifices, and so together, we can face anything.
I believe that what we have found is a once in a life time kind of thing. Most women wouldn’t have the courage to stand up to me so there’s that, and the fact that I truly adore you baby. There are no other words to describe the hold your love has had on me. You ignite everything, and it’s your desire that keeps our boat rocking steady.