How To Lose A Girl In 5 Weeks
One of the riskiest moves I’ve made all year has been to put my heart on the line again. After a previous lovers escapade and many obstacles littering the way – resulting in the art of loss, I wondered if I had truly learned anything. I would soon find out in a relatively short time frame. Shortly after declaring, in a previous posting, that I was in fact ready to love again – I met a woman. She was quite beautiful which initially drew me in. And even with the knowledge that looks could be deceiving, I looked at her as a gift with real meaning. An opportunity to love again or so I was thinking. Never considering that hurt would again temper my heart and its unhurried beating. The very next day after publishing the blog post being referenced, I decided to download a dating app for the purpose of making myself a match. A recipe for either love or disaster was in the making and I forever the student of love and life was aptly taken.
I am not sure about anyone else, but I am not in the habit of setting my heart up to be fractured or broken. Another shot at true love this dating app could bring me – I was hoping. And then it happened. I’m not sure what it was that inspired this beauty to contact me online, but she did. Ok, I lie. I’m sure it had something to do with my profile; well-written and edited, all my I’s were dotted and my T’s properly crossed and shit. And then there was my picture, and the lips that most women seem to first notice. I was all ready to solicit my love in hopes of forming a new relationship – and I hoped that she would know this. I received an email in my inbox stating so and so wanted to meet me. I checked her profile pictures, and then read her profile discretely. I wanted to know all about this beauty who wanted to get to know me. So I took the next step and sent a message that she could read. I don’t talk in text speak or use numbers and letters to compose greetings. What I mean by that is, I wasn’t sure if she would even feel me. She might have thought I was a nerd, or worse, that I was cheesy. I’m ok with either one – what’s not to love about a well-spoken geek? Most people these days use common phrases such as “hru” (how are you), so to speak. And don’t even get me started on the grandma in her 60’s that hit me up wearing nothing but a dusty ass bra, talking about she’s looking for a licking from a studwithswag, so baby what’s up? Absolutely nothing was. I’d already found the tree that I would soon be climbing up.
As far as I was concerned this beauty that found me was prime fish… only because I don’t eat beef or else she’d be prime rib. So, I took the splash and sent the message. Yeah, I admit it, I was feeling some kind of fresh. I waited for her reply and it came back fast. I was instantly impressed. So we exchanged messages for a while until she messaged me her digits. I never ask for them from women, so I was happy when she did it. We converted to texting and there was never any sexting. We were both genuine in the conversations we were having. And we had great conversations mind you, it really does exist. She was looking for long-term love and I had plenty of experience. You thought I was long-winded, well you ain’t seen nothing yet. We typed pages in the journals that we housed our mental notebooks in. In the midst of exchanging pleasantries, we set a foundation that we wanted to further things. Perhaps we might have hurried things. Typical lesbians if you know what I mean.
I, the poet, and she the artist, she shared her sketches and I wrote with prowess. I wrote her poetry for days. I wooed her as though she was becoming my everything. Was it meant to be or not to be, I asked myself from time to time. Were things moving too quickly, I wondered in the corners of my mind. She was quickly becoming mine and that’s all I seemed to recognize. Blinded by her light, the darkness crept up but didn’t block out her shine. The honeymoon phase that new lovers go through was feeling unusually sublime. I let her take the lead in communicating with me because I can be hasty at times. I wanted to monitor my dealings – put feathered handcuffs on my feelings. For wanting to rush things along can bring about an end that won’t end ideally. So, I sat back and watched and waited as we went through the motions. Talking about everything under the sun and often times exchanging sweet nothings. As we drank from each other’s love potions, I could feel myself swimming in her ocean. She seemed pleasantly surprised at how I wanted her so wide open. When we’d video chat I could see it in her eyes. We kept hope afloat and it felt magical for a time.
I wondered where this beauty came from and why she’d been missing from my life. We were moving so fast, with no seatbelts, and I was holding on for dear life. I could make her laugh and turn her on, what more was needed to make a house a home. A whole lot but you couldn’t tell me anything. I stopped moving with caution eventually. I was sure she was the one into my future I would be proud to lead. Looking back now, I wonder what exactly I was smoking, and what was really in her love potion that could make me believe so succinctly. That had me totally dismiss the malfunctions in the three wheeled motion we rode on ignorantly. Like the tide – love was turning over. I was becoming smitten; with my heart clear as day on my sleeve. She was on a mission and her heart had already targeted me. Any negative intuition, I didn’t want to know, any disastrous fruition you couldn’t pay me to see. I was so ready for her love and affection I tossed the red flags out onto the street.
I was ready for any and all of her romantic innuendo. And then disaster struck. She said I was too sweet. Well damn. Silly me. There’s a first for everything.