The Swag Report » Humanity

There Are Always Haters

Knowledge — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 22:18:17 +0000

We were on a long walk in the park

in late August

The lake water shimmered against the sun’s gaze

fall was upon us

And I stopped to lean against a tree

It was the farthest one I could find

You leaned against me and a passerby said something like,

“It won’t last ladies” as if there was something we were hiding

When it was their own love that was washed away with the tide

Long ago along the way when running laps through hearts lapsed

But we enjoy the playful breeze and embrace in practice

And pretend not to listen as thoughts run through our heads

And we enjoy the disguise of being one with one another instead

Tip-toes arch, arms out stretch as I press my body upon her

We gaze deeply while set ablaze letting our desires run asunder

Full of life as we touch every sense is ignited

Ignoring glares and stares of lives left unenlivened

Having never experienced the passion incited

With flailing hearts set to stone

Engulfed within the bodies of ice cold people

In spite of

This love we find ourselves dabbling in

By those same critics

Recusing when love reaches in

Yet somehow our feelings are mental holograms

Situated in a place they can’t conceive of when

They know love can’t be cloned so they remain discontented

Like people trapped inside of aliens

When aliases break down – they condense

But we are signed, sealed and delivered – for love is like that

It is senseless when it triggers

With every kiss that we extract

The most intense feeling that ever existed

Outside of pain anyway

Which most of them are inflicted with

I think as I press my lips to hers once again

And listen to the thoughts fluttering in

Silently uttering something reminiscent of

“Poor them…”

The Universe in Discord

Knowledge — Sat, 08 Oct 2011 17:00:38 +0000

They shootin’ rockets at the moon
Claim they lookin’ for water
Awarding President’s Peace Prizes
He ain’t done shit to stop the slaughter
Requires a crisis of conscious
Why a crisis is upon us
But I don’t wish for terrible things
Only for them to be spun off us
Brought out into the light
To get to the center of truth
You gotta open up part of the sky
Then watch for signs to confuse
Everyone can’t see clearly enough get to the root of things
How sinning is the process – of defying our divinity
How there is some function beyond loving that is the key to all of this
Life – and how short time flies as the clock continues to tick
You better hope for reincarnation
Pray that spirits do live
Infinitely tending Earth’s garden ’til humans bring about its end
Intimately tending Earth’s population ’til all children eventually blend
When our creations recreate, remember we are not all God’s children
We do not share similar worries
Wondering if Adonai is really Elohim
In whoever’s image we were created
We must strive to get to know ‘Em
Not just in religious connotation – trust that all God’s people are chosen
All lumped in as one but what it doesn’t state is this:
Nationality vs. Race leaves massive inequalities and tension
Neither truly define our right as human beings to live contented
Using tools without instructions creating chaos laced good intentions
And with it no true history incorporated into educational institutions
Must it all be in vain
Must our knowledge remain hidden
As long as they keep the truth in chains
History repeats like time’s a villain
Therein lies the truth we know time and again has been re-written
Felt by many over lifetimes
Passed over-stood until we’re smitten
But in the end – only truth remains
It’s clearly defined as life’s true mission

Deciphering A Purpose

Knowledge — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 18:00:50 +0000

Every day I reflect on the person I am becoming.
A constant work in progress I used to call myself, but it’s more like a constantly evolving process in which I’m resolving my former doubt – living life as I know how.
There are times when eliminating toxic things and people from my world take their toll.
But I work on becoming a better me anyway because no one’s path is paved in gold.
I work on recognizing my thoughts, feelings, wants and needs for what they are and addressing them accordingly.
I accept the things I cannot change and change the things I can when I’m avoiding complacency.
Is life meant to be enjoyed or is it a discovery of sorts… that will constantly leave you wondering what else there is in store.
It is meant to be questioned, challenged, debated and argued about.
It is meant to be a learning journey, a perpetual adventure for knowledge or doubt.
In depth or not, when we come to the end of our road are we supposed to be able to walk away from it all?
With the knowledge that our existence made a difference, no matter how big or small?
It means something to more than just friends and family and the odd stranger we run across along the way.
Paying it forward is life’s biggest reward – and presents an unexpected payday.
Doing nice things for random people and expecting nothing in return – now that’s an exceptional display of human nature at its most basic form.
Speaking up when injustices occur. Takes bravery and courage. Not becoming the root cause of our problems, just like with happiness, means moving forward.
Every one of us, fighting daily battles to overcome and advance in the struggles for and against and for what?
Strengths and weaknesses are put to the forefront and wrestled with every day.
The grind is constant, like prophets and the many sights they’ve seen (scene) and played.
We are always being watched; observed and whether or not we recognize it, these occurrences hold special importance for each and every one of us.
Our ancestors are watching, believe it or not.
There have been times where I have given no care in the world and have subsequently done things I am most definitely ashamed of.
I wonder, will they still embrace the love that lives within my heart, dispersing itself to all my nerve endings… is the finish dictated by the start.
Deep regret was a distant but close relative of mine and in the same vein love overcomes all of that in time.
Regret, but restart your engine please.
Begin again regardless of any pending vacancy.
It’s important to care and equally so is the importance of fostering meaningful friendships on a level that’s fair. Where all is equally laid to bare.
More so is the importance of sometimes doing things you don’t want to for the greater good, i.e. fostering kinship’s. Pulling myself out of the occasional rut; a key component to success so when I’m in that rut and doing terribly I can ask, “why is this?” and know exactly why this is.
Achieving takes more than believing. When I get stuck, I have to patiently become undone using whatever it takes. Whether it be blood or spilling my guts, peeling off the outer shell before cracking more nuts.
Because it’s so easy to get stuck and feel helpless when you know all that you can accomplish can only be done when you are selfless.
Embracing my fears, while remaining fearless. Unafraid of shedding tears, because showing emotions is courageous. Peer pressure can bear down and cause the opposite effect.
When buried at the root, that’s where you’ll find the isolated problem, and what can happen is that we start looking for someone or something to lift us up without lifting a hand to assist with it ourselves.
We should be looking to our God or some other higher power or whoever it is we believe in, not only to give us strength, but to help us find the power within ourselves to carry on and persist.
To live. To exist. The best lessons are learned hardest and I’m certain I’ll have to teach myself most of the important ones all over again.
And mostly for love when the lack of it is threatening.
It’s necessary to do this when we forget how to exist.
How to put forward our best foot and allow the other to create its own footstep.
Like my dad sometimes says, “we often revert back to the fundamentals no matter what the discipline.”
The fundamentals align with the bigger picture and we expand upon them.
Every single day, expounding upon the basics so to say.
It’s important that we practice taking the necessary steps to ensure that we possess the ability to dig so deep within that we feel as if we might become lost in the bottom.
And although we know exactly what’s needed to reach into that place and then back out of that sometimes unsavory space, we do it anyway.
Use that power and energy… to pull ourselves out of the quick sand because life is short and goes by too fast.
And like quick sand if you’re not fast enough you can sink right in.
Everyone deserves happiness and contentment, but not at the purposeful disadvantage of others, even ourselves and how we’re living.
No exceptions.
Life, for everyone, is not whole, but life as a whole is a work in progress for all to dig our heels in, but don’t forget to alleviate our stress.
Answer the call.
On a continuum of continuity. That there’s life. It goes on, infinitely.
And there’s nothing, not a damn thing wrong with accessing the full potential of the human genome.
Our bodies, ourselves - following a natural pursuit of using life as a tool bodes well.
Ironically, that is exactly what happens whether or not we stop to acknowledge and pay tribute to our prowess, especially if it is of the good variety.
Everything we do in life harbors growth.
Spirit, energy, it never dies, and is always searching, for another place another time – another life or an alternate purpose.
Every time we love it is passed on to the next person – place or thing. It’s never too far gone from life’s quilted seams.
Every moment of our lives can be penetrated and what’s derived is the very best and worst that our souls have sacrificed in payment.
With every breath drawn, a canvas is created and artistry never knew such a beautiful diversion until our last breath drawn out makes every moment spent on this earth and beyond…
Most truly worthwhile.

The Transformation of Lives

Knowledge — Tue, 10 May 2011 23:04:05 +0000

How is it
That in such a short time
You have produced a fear
That has crippled our stride
As I watched my baby’s face succumb
To news neither of us were expecting
We became numb
Breast cancer
the diagnosis
It was confirmed to us
It had dug in its trenches
Tracked footprints across
Our hearts, beating away
Never detached for naught
As we prayed for an answer
I felt the suns rays
I’ll never forget that day
and I’ll never forget this fight
Against a terrible nightmare
dreaming away precious life
But we will fight against it
the call has been heard
In our minds and our hearts
we will not be deterred
As I stand here in her firmly planted footsteps
Life takes on new meaning
And we trudge straight ahead
For there are no backtracks
We are forever glued
Coping with these cancerous radiant blues
She brings joy to so many
but now with you
The greatest joy to come
when you no longer constitute
When your deadly rampage is no longer ensued
With a body tired
and a soul weakened by battle
In this moment I stand tall
For her – in spite of you
See
When I made her rest her weary soul upon me
I wanted to carry her burden
Because she is deserving
Of my strength and courage
my most prominent ingredients
So I come equipped for
A battle of epic proportioning
Ready to beat the crap
Out of the fear that grips me
I remind myself daily
Of all the things cancer cannot impede
It cannot quell our spirits
It cannot destroy our faith
It cannot dispel the hopes
We placed in dreams of yesterday
It cannot still our passion
Nor our love of life and love
The only way it can win is
If we allow it to, my love

A Poem to Self

Knowledge — Thu, 05 Aug 2010 00:28:24 +0000

My healed black ego
Hides well under the scars
Placed carefully within
Misshapen bouts of depression
Can’t think clear enough
Through the emotional discarding
Of those well-sung lullabies
I used to sing myself at night
Flying through the open window
Out of a heavily burdened mind
Makes me thank God
For how feminine love makes me
Feels so free to alleviate
Any discord that plagues me
Like how the daily motions
of dallying in masculinity
Cause others to abhor
As if forced to cosign some obscenity
Yet with the flick of a wrist
I can go right back to being pretty
‘Cause I am female baby
I am all encompassing
I am… above all else
The only soul that can never deny me
But for the moment I am just a tomboy
And love makes me feel feminine
And masculine
And so wide open
I want to bask in it
‘Cause I’m comfortable
In my own skin now
Forget that mousy little quiet girl’s smile
… she was all me
And there is this strength in silence
It’s as resilient as the sun is
Even in the midst of violence
Never forgetting that late spring
Was the moment my story began
I melted like chocolate into my heart
There existed no privacy
No prior knowledge to impart
No dead bolted doors
My soul was already unlocked
The key was all yours
Though mind’s currently deadlocked
Calloused from years of playing
Too much hard ball
The cracks filled in the spaces
Where losses formed a cold heart
But I no longer allow
Old bruises to further fuel
No concessions
Plus my ego’s tall enough
To carry us through any storm
No side-stepping
‘Cause love takes time
And I give in to what’s mine, mi amore
Plenty of objectives to overcome
Heart’s sick and tired of being lonely
No longer afraid to open up
No emotions coming unrelenting
And to tell you the truth
Everything that’s good about me
I find it beating in a heart
That loves whether awake or sleeping

Thoughts In Constant Motion

Knowledge — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 06:17:33 +0000

photo: Sam D.

They come and go
Like a night time revival
Only it’s morning and
We’re thick as thieves
As we come together
Ready for rigmarole’s ritual
Fluttering about like tepid feathers
Rigid thoughts centered on
Not stepping on toes
Or missing the next run
Experiencing the ruminations of others
Lives daft with woe
And fraught with wonder
As this journey takes hold
It highlights my day
Saw a woman sneaking onto the bus the back way
Words don’t come easy but inspiration does
Surfaces all around
Since my journey’s mostly made up
Of time that I bide
’till the end of the line comes
Late as usual
Apathetic to following rules cause
I aim to balance out my bad attitude
And I’m relentless
In proving whatever needed to be proved
There are days when I can’t stop them
They move in mass
like Catholic children
in Sunday school best
walking briskly through the tunnel
That ends as fast as it begins
And we stand strong in the train cars
We’re all stuck in
Stuffed like turkeys but breathing as wild as chickens
anxious and proud as we’re destined for our destinations
lurking behind support bars with pockets safely tucked in
else they suffer the same fate as pick pocket victims
It’s to cold to sweat it but plenty of time to plan ahead
My journey moves me
Like walking in snow and fighting wind
Carving foot prints one by one
Cause hindsights already set in
Cherishing every deep breath
Glasses fogging up quick
Obstructing my field of vision
But not nearly all of it…
Inspiration fills me up and
Music rocks me forthwith
Ear drums no longer celibate
“Watch for ice” – “And don’t slip!”
I yearn to arrive at the doorstep
So I can get down to business

The Beautiful Part I

Knowledge — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 18:08:59 +0000

The beautiful are unafraid
to bear the deepest parts of the soul
They face fears without regard
to any sentiment that may engulf
They bravely take the charge
don’t cry foul when the tables turn ’round
The beautiful reflect the good in some
while never once on us looking down
The beautiful are the rarest
the most well rounded of us all
Personify the golden mean in man
And the gravity that’s soon to fall

Dedicated to those who constantly make me want to be a better person. The world needs you. Never stop being.

image by Nonnetta

Sometimes The World Sucks

Knowledge — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 21:45:26 +0000

i.
It’s not always obvious, but it’s often staring you in the face.
It’s a feeling, a sickness; an evil called hate.
News and media are filled with it, although most can’t even relate.
Writers and poets are all too aware and through their words retaliate.
Hate means “intense dislike, to feel antipathy or an aversion towards.”
Not concerned with the good in others just the judging that often occurs.
Innocents killed, in pursuit of truth, when all along they were waging war.
Pride and arrogance allows its stay, while leaders worship the dollar more.
Governments are just as guilty as the religious politicians they protect.
Illegal wars, being fought in waves, declared by a twice-marred president.
The terrorists they seek wreak havoc on people in pursuit of power and control.
Hence the killing of civilian’s — place terrorists’ lives above the law.

ii.
If good begets good - evil begets evil.
Two wrongs don’t make a right, yet both create states of upheaval.
Morality falters as we witness hunger, poverty and a world at war.
Children forced to take up arms, then returned to a home that’s been war-torn.
For those in power, education is not as important as winning the next election.
The importance is placed on bling blinging instead of on sexual protection.
The world is restless to its core, the consequences of an uneasy dichotomy.
The current state of the world at large is a reminder that we need our autonomy.
The knowledge that power corrupts the best of us is proof enough of our own fallacy.
The SEC and Federal Reserve won’t stop considering the dollar bill almighty.
And the disconnect between Wall Street and those fueling the economy is deceiving.
Ah, but for now it seems that the powers that be will get paid to postpone the Revolution indefenitely.

Deciphering A Purpose

Thank You To My Readers

Knowledge — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 05:57:39 +0000

i.
I love to write, create and conceptualize words,
And phrase them in ways I haven’t before heard.
Sometimes I come up with different topics for my blog,
But more often than not it’s those random disconnected thoughts.
That pop up.
They aren’t consistent enough to write about in the first place.
Secondly this results in saved drafts pending for days,
Until I get the urge to review, revise and edit away.
I use those times to process and frame,
Come up with a style that accurately depicts my range.
I used to be bad about dumbing down simple shit,
So they could understand the meaning
In the words that I re-missed.
Constantly dropping hints,
In my writing here and there,
I had to get serious.

ii.
Words owned me,
When I adopted a writing style.
Punctuation and grammar police.
Let me alone for awhile.
But I stayed being lazy pen to pad.
For years I wrote unfocused,
Just for the hell of it.
Directionless and mainly as a way to alleviate stress.
Celebrate pleasure, pain, and at times to taste success.
I’ve lent my fingers and my head time and time again.
Even still writing remains.
My escape from all of it.

iii.
I read each and every comment left.
Whatever’s taken from my diction,
Mostly your thoughts impress,
Upon me and exact a certain thankfulness.
I take heed to what you’ve taken from taking the time to read.
Then I take you to heart.
Because, well, that’s just me.
From time to time, I feel it necessary to reply,
Directly to a comment that’s directed at mine.
Once in a while, I may be inclined,
To honor it with it’s own post,
In regard to a question why.
Partly to share the response with everybody,
The understanding it could bring,
To another person inquiring.
Don’t feel slighted in the least,
If you don’t hear back from me.
Guarantee it probably means,
Damn you got me.
Thinking
It’s hard enough to not become monotonous.
Add to the fact that when writing gets sporadic,
I go with the flow.
Or go nuts.
Cause unlike Janet,
I don’t need control.
Me and my notepad,
We go way back, yo.

iv.
In high school they called me a dreamer.
Said my head was always in the clouds,
And what I would dream of would never amount.
Yet not once did they cater to my expectations.
Barely passing in sacrifice for streetwise occupations.
I sucked it up and caught wind of my future despite fears.
That I hadn’t put enough stock into prior years.
I pushed myself and waged wars against doubt.
Allowed the past to remain time capped.
At least for now.
Toward every end leads a begin,
To put it bluntly, sans finis.
Thanks to all who read my blog.
This one’s for you.

The End.

image: mike otto