Quasi Coherent Ramblings II

I can’t believe this woman had the nerve to get an attitude

As if this understanding we’ve reached is giving her some extra latitude

Well it ain’t

The situation is simply propagated by emotion filled rage over issues we’ve recently engaged

I had no idea the very prospect of my realizations came through “weary hatin’ eyes”

Hear you tell it

As if I’ve ever felt like the rapport we shared would dare not fare just as nicely with another as it has with me

Naw, but I’m hatin’ though ~ All up in your business ~ Well excuse the expletive out of me

These simplicities don’t strike upon me as ones worth even debating about with thee

That means you

I am certainly not with it nor your contradictions regarding questions and reflections

Shined a light on my past and again I’m on blast

But, I’m okay with that

Because you have done the same fucking thing

Don’t lack understanding

For it is that which you can offer me the most despite our pandering

I never understood or asked for this strife

After all, it’s my mother fuckin’ love life

Brought on by some bitch who was somebody else’s wife

I live in utter disbelief that of every insecurity bestowed upon me

I am stuck in the stench of my own defeat

And this feeling from the inside is stripping me

Of my pride and especially my dignity

I Am A Strong Stud

But what does that matter when in the end all we have is our own complicated beings with which to ascribe

Unpredictable qualms about what’s going on inside

I feel it; that beat, thumping furiously

My heart; aka the beast within me

Hanging on to shoestrings sewn together too thin

That’s how they loved me back then

But now, my story; somewhat different

My love and trust; somehow unconvincing?

Why does the blunt end of your unsubscription accompany this love that I’m defending

Onto my heart ~ thoughts – a constant scramble

A tug of war with emotions

A constant battle for the win

No longer masking back breaking bends for or against

Well, which is it?

Do you want me or just enjoy the idea of us

And what we could be

Loves enticing intricacies laid bare for all to see




3 Responses to “Quasi Coherent Ramblings II”
  1. TomboyTigress says:

    Ah, that tug of war of emotions–that constant inner struggle to overcome our pasts…I believe more often than not we punish ourselves for our past more than anyone else. But as much with success, with each mistake…we learn, we grow…and hopefully it makes us better people in the long run.

    This was deep, very well written.

  2. FynDaddi says:

    Love It!

  3. vanessa says:

    yes…tug of war..perfect words to describe it.. the push-pull… sometimes you just feel like a dog chasing its tail.

    we move forward, but cant resist the urge to glance in our rear view mirror!

    this was very powerful! loved it!
    .-= vanessa´s last blog ..this is some bullshit. =-.

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